I think I'm a good mom...most of the time. I try to be the best mom I can be...most of the time. But I'd like to be a better mom...all of the time.
I want to be the sort of mom that never loses her patience. The sort of mom that doesn't answer a whining voice in a frustrated tone. The sort of mom who never resorts to yelling as a means of communication. Sadly, I do all of these things on a regular basis.
I'm guilty. I'm guilty of spending time on the computer that should be spent working on ABC's. I'm guilty of saying bad words within ear shot of my little ones, and telling them later "that's not nice," when I hear those same words repeated. I'm guilty of saying "no," only to give in after the fiftieth "please!" I'd like to be the sort of mom who isn't guilty of these things.
I'm not perfect. I'm so far from it that I am perfectly imperfect. I want to be a better mom. I try every day to change just one thing. To be a little bit better at just one thing. Today I have not shouted at my kids. I consider that a small victory.
It's amazing when I think about it. I'm just a person. A person trying to get by. Trying to live the best life I know how to live. Trying to be the best mom I know how to be. Trying to ensure that I don't mess them up. Rather, that I help my children reach their full potential. Trying to ensure that some day, if she so wishes, that my daughter will be a better mom than I. To ensure that Colton, if he so wishes, will be a better parent than I.
I'm a good mom...I just want to be a better mom.