Super Noob [Search results for Marriage] 

I'm not exactly sure when it happened...but I've been trained. I'm so ashamed. Once upon a time I stood my ground. I made a statement, and I held to it. Was I only dreaming?

When Addyson came along, she began training me immediately. Boy, was I surprised. See, I was so sure that I would be training her. I even planned to have her eat and sleep on a schedule. She was going to be the best sleeping baby that ever graced God's green earth. I even read Babywise in preparation. Well, Addyson did not read her copy of the book, and she had other plans. For twelve weeks I held her for every nap. Well, I did, or Andy did (don't even get me started there, we were so at each other's throats). Holding her at naptime wouldn't have been so bad if she would have slept in a sling so I could multi task. Heck, I would have been happy if she would have let me hold her and just read a book. Again, she had her own ideas. My darling daughter had to be in her room, with the shudders closed, in my lap while rocking in the glider. If one of these criteria wasn't met, all hell (yes hell) broke out in the Mamma household. So you see, she has been working us from the start.

When she was 12 weeks, I was finally determined to teach her how to sooth herself at naptime. This bolgna started to seep into our nights (which to that point had been just fine, she'd nurse two or three times a night and go straight back down), so we sleep trained. It was the best thing I ever could have done...for her, for me... for my marriage ;) In three days time she would go down for a nap in her own crib with no soothing from me. Amazing.

Today, I was thinking about this as I lay next to her during rest time. It dawned on me that somewhere along the way, she worked me over. Did you notice the first sentence of this paragraph? That's right...as I lay next to her during rest time (insert record skip). It's the only way I can get her to nap now, and even that is failing lately. So I may throw in the towel. We may just give up once and for all on the old naptime for Addyson. That or I'll still be sleeping with her when I'm 80.

Admitting I am wrong is not something that comes easily or naturally to me. Perhaps it has something to do with my descending from a line of people who tend to believe they are most often right. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that usually...well, I am right. Ahem. Moving right along.

I can liken my marriage to a favorite c.d., a faithful old mix of my most favorite songs. Songs that are familiar, comfortable. Feel good music by which I can dance my way through life. My husband and I groove through in the dance that he and I have perfected over time. Then, just like with that faithful old c.d., my husband and I hit a scratch. Errrrrr...music stops. Like today.

Part of our Sunday routine is my preparing the menu/grocery list and his going to the store to retrieve the items on said list. Nap time for the little ones rolled around in the middle of my making this list (as it usually does), and Addyson decided to pitch a fit today. Instead of immediately squelching her tantrum (because, come on, every dad knows how to do this), Andy gave a little try, then waited for me to do something about it. At least that was my clouded perception at the time. So I grew bristles. Bristles the likes of which you usually only see on the teddy bear cholla. Sounds cute and cuddly, right? Guess again. Get too close to one of these little suckers and OUCH! Well, Andy was unfortunate enough to get jabbed with a few of my prongs today. My attitude went from bad to worse when his response to me was just to bristle right back. Seems normal, right? Well, sadly it too often is...normal I mean.

Why should it be though? I am sitting here now thinking about what I jerk I was. Seriously. Was it that big of a deal that he didn't fix the situation to my satisfaction? How sad that in that moment all I could think about was myself, and the fact that he wasn't behaving as I thought he should. How quickly all his other good deeds went by the wayside. Both days this weekend, Andy got up with our daughter (who seems to be closely related to the rooster), so that I could sleep in. This morning, as he does every Sunday, he got the two little ones dressed and ready for church (after feeding them breakfast) so that I could get ready myself. Awesome, right? So you think I should be able to cut him a little slack, and loose my nasty attitude. I know, I think so too.

That's why I have decided to make the proclomation here on my blog for all to read. Andy has some wonderful qualities, and I like to think that a good deal of the time I am able to bring out those qualities. Sometimes, though...I clearly do not. So from now on I will work my hardest to behave in such a way as to bring out those fabulous qualities of which he is chock full. In doing so, he in turn brings out my most redeeming qualities as well. Because let's face it, while the Teddy Bear Cholla sounds cute, it's just not.